There will be times where I want to engage in sex with my husband but when It comes down to having sex I dont engage at all. I feel scared. Does anyone else go through this?
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- 15Responses
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Yes. I’ll say okay let’s have sex in hope it will get me into it, but it doesn’t happen.
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Yes. Omg thanks for asking this question. You’re not alone. Sometimes I think about it, and I want it, and I want to want it, but then...I try and I’m not into it.
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When we're having sex it's amazing but it's starting and getting in the mood that I freeze up.
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All the time! I almost have a fear of having sex because even when I feel like I have the desire, it’s like my body betrays me. It really sucks.
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You’re not alone at all!
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When he asks I get frustrated and my stress level rises. Then he gets frustrated. It's an every night battle in my home.
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Belle2004, I feel the same way. I mean when we do have sex I always say I want more of this but my stress levels go so high and I panic for some reason. He also gets frustrated because I don't want it to ruin my marriage.
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I dont even have the desire to have sex. If he touches me sexually I tell him to knock it off. He gets frustrated and I feel so bad.
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I agree with Kelly, I don't have any desire at all to have sex. It is not comfortable for me (have tried tons of positions, lubes, toys, etc), it takes me forever to get in the mood (and then my mind has already started wandering elsewhere to all the million other things I need to or should be doing), and when we do have sex I honestly do not enjoy it. I end up agreeing to have sex because I know my husband wants and needs it. It is also often painful for me because my vaginal muscles can never seem to get relaxed. We have been married for 25 years and have been together for 27. We have one daughter who is 13. Our sex life was good early in our marriage...but once we had our daughter, my desire was like 'poof' and disappeared.
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I’ve been made to feel selfish and guilty since I have no interest. He doesn’t want me to just go through the motions but also says I owe it to him to have sex.
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This is exactly how I feel. I’m so glad I’m not broken...
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I feel exactly the same. I have no drive whatsoever and then sometimes when my husband wants to be intimate I just feel so gross. Then there are times where I want to initiate but I'm absolutely terrified. So then I dont. I feel pathetic
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Been like this for years. I’m 33. It did not help my marriage, but it’s not what broke things. (‘‘Twas him..) When you start to get into it, then poof! I’m bored. What’s on tv? What should I wear to work tomorrow. Should I shave my legs..... etc only like 2 min passes. Has it been 15? Feels like it. Didn’t know this was a real thing ‘till I saw the commercial on tv.
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I go thru this all the time. My husband and I have been together over 16yrs. You would think one would be confident and comfortable with husband by then even after having one child. I never turn him down when he engages though, bc I know he needs it and desires it. Plus I never know if I might be in the mood. but I feel so bad when I can't seem to get in the mood. I mean when I am in the mood things are Great, but why cant i always be for him. I love my husband to death always have and will always. I am scared he might find someone else with a high sex level life to pleasure him. My self esteem and confidence and ect end up effecting put relationship so bad whenever I end up pointing out I can tell he is frustrated with my sex drive. I really do want to please him and make things better for the both of us. But dont know what to do. So many things go thru my head.
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I am so glad I ran across this thread. I feel the exact same way. I want to initiate sex with my man but I am to scared to do it. Not really scared but I can’t talk myself into allowing myself to do it.