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What age were you when you first noticed low sexual desire?

  • 47Responses
  • Answered 4 years ago
    Late 20s
  • Answered 4 years ago
    18, after having my child.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    Late 20s for sure
  • Answered 4 years ago
    About 17
  • Answered 4 years ago
    26 years old
  • Answered 4 years ago
    37 after I had my daughter
  • Answered 4 years ago
    34 years old
  • Answered 4 years ago
    26 years old
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I think I’ve always had it, just didn’t realize it because I wasn’t comparing it to a previous time when I had a normal sex drive; it’s just how I always was.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    It was in my early 20's and has just got worse every year and now that i am almost 40 i have no desire
  • Answered 4 years ago
    For me it was just over a year and a half ago, at 31. It was really surprising for me, and I didn’t feel like myself at all. I’ve always had a really really active libido and really fulfilling sex life... I feel like HSDD took an important part of my identity away.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    37
  • Answered 4 years ago
    i’m 26 and i definitely don’t feel myself
  • Answered 4 years ago
    26
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I don’t know too much about it, but I think I’ve always been this way or had it. Growing up I never understood everyone’s obsession with sex. It never really appealed to me or seemed that important in my life. I still don’t and I’m 21. When my partner wants to have sex I often don’t. I’m not in the mood hardly ever, and I wish I was ..
  • Answered 4 years ago
    27, about 6 months before I got pregnant with my first child. And since motherhood, it has only worsened — to the point of me not wanting to be in a relationship anymore, and he could likely feel the same.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    Early 20's
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I think I was born this way but I’ve always felt like there is something wrong with me because this is how I am. Doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy myself or that the act isn’t satisfying, but most of the time I can take it or leave it. I’m 53 and never even knew there was an actual name for it.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I noticed it starting to go around 28 and then it completely disappeared after I had a major surgery. It really effects my relationship with my husband. He wants to start a family feel guilty that I have no desire for sex. I love him and I'm attracted to him but my body just doesn't cooperate. Makes me feel like a bad wife.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    32 - it's been like this for awhile, but I just thought it was because I was unusually tired all of the time.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    im 29 now but after the birth of my third child in 2015 is when I really noticed that I could care less about having sex. It sucks. I have no desire anymore. At all.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I'm almost ashamed to say, but probably late 40's. I'm 55 now and am in pre menopause so I'm sure that has something to do with it.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I think It started in my early 20s. Wish I could fix it but nothing helps
  • Answered 4 years ago
    22, after my first child. Birth control didn’t help matters any either, then I just had my second at 24 and it’s at an all time low.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I have never had a super active sex drive, but I still wanted it enough to do it, after I got pregnant 2 years ago it went completely away... I'm only 23 I don't want to live this way... I feel like I'm missing so much
  • Answered 4 years ago
    After I had my 1st kid at 22 it was gone.... I'm now 27 and it's barely there..
  • Answered 4 years ago
    Right after I had my son, at 27. Postpartum depression. Major body image issues. With therapy was able to turn that around after a couple years. Now I'm almost 48, divorced, and have zero desire to date. Sex is something other people have. I never pictured myself like this at this age. Just seems way too young for it to be gone.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I was very sexually active when I met my husband. We would fool around a bit but he really wanted to wait until we were married to have intercourse. A couple years into us dating, my sexual desire for him just disappeared, as of overnight! I figured it was temporary and it would come back later but here we are 3 years later and married. My sexual drive never recovered.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    26 is when it started to become a problem in my relationship. I’m 27 now and it’s only getting more apparent I have little interest in having sex. Being touched doesn’t even excite me anymore.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    For me, it was when I was 20. I went on the Depo shot for birth control. Over the course of the year I was on it, my desire disappears to literally no desire. Before the shot, my husband and I had the same sex drive. I’ve been off of it now for 2.5 years and it’s never come back. Not a single bit. I’ve become desperate to get it back and I’m so glad I’ve found this place.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I am currently 51 and going through menopause which is a known libido killer, however, I've never really had a sex drive that I'm aware of. Yes, I had sex and on very rare occasions even managed to enjoy it...but never felt compelled that it was something I wanted to do spontaneously (if that even makes sense). Now I have absolutely zero drive. If there is a number less than zero that's probably more accurate. I have three children, 2 of whom are grown and 1 who is almost 17. I have been married to my husband for 20 years ( previously have been divorced). I don't know that I'm even distressed about it at this point, it seems that's just the way it is and has been for me.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I was in my early twenties. My bf and I would have sex every time I saw him because we never knew when we’d see each other again. Then when we moved in, it became less and less frequent. Then when I turned 25 I notice I had close to no desire. I blamed it on my depression medication but I slowly noticed it’s not that.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    About 43. Dealt with 3 special needs kids for 19 yrs. And it was a relief that they could be semi independent. Then depression and anxiety got really bad. It's like it went completely away to the point I dont want him to touch me in any sexual way.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    34, after having my one and only child, a daughter. Have never had any desire since she was born 13 years ago. This is a big issue for my husband, he gets very upset about it and thinks that it is totally abnormal for me (now 46 years old) to have no desire at all.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    Really started noticing it probably around 50 and then had a hysterectomy at 53 and then absolutely no drive after that (zilch) i always had a pretty healthy sex drive before that, it’s very frustrating and my husband just doesn’t understand no matter how I try to explain it to him. I find myself not even wanting to get close with him because I know where it’s going to lead and I just don’t have it in me.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I’m so glad. To be reading comments and questions here I was beginning to wonder if I’m alone but I didn’t think so. I never really had that urge to have sex. My first experience was with my now husband 46 years ago at 17. Married and baby at 18 almost 19. Sex was great in the beginning, somewhere along the way I started losing desire around in my 40’s. We always fought about frequency. He’s much more aroused than I am. I felt I had the right to say no. He’s ok with that till... we argue a lot about sex because I’m not interested anymore now. That started about 60. I just told him I’m done. That did not go over well and we still fight about it. It causes me anxiety in the evenings. We are both considering how to move forward. Stay together or leave over sex.... it’s becoming a major problem for me now. Hubby doesn't believe women don’t want or need sex. Thinks I’m just holding out on him. No understanding at all. I’m at my wits end
  • Answered 4 years ago
    18. For sure. Seeing everyone around me so into sex, while I was on the side wondering what the big deal was about....
  • Answered 4 years ago
    @Kady Your partner sounds a bit like a jerk...
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I've always lived like this but found out the name for it when I was 20.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I never knew HSDD was a thing until recently, and i'm 38. I realized that my desire for intimacy far outweighed my desire for sex when I was in my early 20s. I found that I would have sex but not really enjoy it, nor would I ever be 'in the mood'. My partner would always initiate, and it would take them a VERY long time to rev the engine. It still happens now with my husband of 6 years. It is incredibly frustating!
  • Answered 4 years ago
    At 26 after my first child was born it slowly went away then my second born at 35 my sex drive is non existent. My husband and are no longer speaking to each other because I give him excuses 3why I don't want to have sex.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    It's gone down slowy since I had my first child at 24. Here I am 12+ years later at 37 with no interest. I hate it because I want to be there for my husband, but I can't bring myself to get to the point where I can actually go through with having sex or letting him touch me.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I’ve always felt so uncomfortable talking about this because it started when I was so young and it’s a very taboo subject. I never knew what age everyone else was once they started experiencing things like arousal but I felt as a child I was all the time. The last time I can remember feeling so was in 3rd grade which if that’s correct I was probably around 8 years old which seems so young to be getting those kind of feelings. However as I said before that is the last time I felt aroused and I haven’t ever been since. I’m now 23. I’ve been to doctors who have never taken me seriously and once even went to a therapist who repeatedly accused me of lying about not ever having any negative sexual experiences (sexual assault, rape, etc..) so frustrating.. I still masterbate for the orgasms and do enjoy the intimacy of sex however I just can’t get aroused which gets really discouraging when I have the memory of what the feeling should be like in the back of my head.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    It started about 45...I'm 54 now. My husband is patient, but I know he is hurt by this.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    It started when I was 27 last year and since then it's been hard to be able to enjoy sex with my boyfriend. I love him alot and he loves me as well but whenever he wants to have sex with me I can't seem to find it pleasurable all the time.
  • Answered 4 years ago
    I feel like I have always had very very low desire. But it got worse in my 30’s after starting depression medication and even less now I’m my 40’s and maybe pre-menopausal.
  • Answered 3 years ago
    For me it's so weird orgasm is easy I still have a moderate labido but arousal is so so hard, i don't have to be turned on my clitoris just responds to touch/friction. The problem is I feel like my sexuality is fragmented because from the age of 10-18 arousal was ridiculously easy for me, I mean just a simple kissing scene would get my heart racing, tingles, throbbing, intense desire etc. and that always felt AMAZING BUT during that age range although arousal was easy I never attempted to get myself off (shame and guilt surrounding sex). THEN when I turned 18 idk it's like something shut off instantly I just couldn't get turned on anymore (I realized I didn't respond to sex scenes the way I used to at all)...this was also the year I finally tried to masturbate (I couldn't get aroused but I was still horny lol) and figured out how to get myself off, so arousal and masturbation have never been connected to me because when I figured out how to get myself to orgasm I was dealing with arousal issues. It's been 8 years and I can only weakly get aroused (not even throbbing just a tension in my clit and slight wetness no swelling tingling or any of the delicious feelings I used to feel so easily when I was younger idk what's wrong with me and I've never heard anyone describe orgasm being easy and having a labido but arousal being difficult I'm so absolutely frustrated because I know there's way more enjoyment to the sexual response and I so desperately want to feel passion and desire not just the physical pleasure...I WANT PLEASURE gah. I didn’t reach out to my doctor when I was younger because I honestly didn't know doctor's could help you with sexual dysfunction (I was young and ignorant) and I felt embarrassed by it anyways but I'm going to as soon as they start lifting restrictions and we can see our GP's again I'm tired of this it's just arousal feels so far away I haven't felt it in so long
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